Guide to Literary Agents - Sunday, August 17, 2008

Have you got a horrible idea for a story? Well I want to hear about it. Welcome to the "Worst Storyline Ever" Contest - a competition that encourages terrible loglines.

A logline is a one-sentence line that explains what your story is about and shows the "hook" - the unique idea that makes people want to see more. You see loglines all the time in TV Guide and on the back of DVD boxes. Here are some examples:

        "Three middle-aged men defeat their midlife crises by starting a college fraternity." (Old School)
        "When a Roman general is betrayed and his family murdered by an evil prince, he comes to Rome as a gladiator to seek revenge." (Gladiator)
        "In a future where criminals are arrested before the crime occurs, a cop struggles on the lam to prove his innocence for a murder he has not yet committed." (Minority Report)

But that's all the examples I'm going to give you, because I'm not looking for good examples of a logline; I'm looking for bad examples. Nay - terrible, stupid, "oh-my-God-that-idea-is-dumb-as-hell" examples.

Examples of Bad Loglines

1. "After the death of his goldfish, a priest renounces his faith and gets a job at the local White Castle, where he becomes addicted to special sauce and tries to dance his way to getting respect on the streets."

2. "A man's lifelong plan to dress up like Jabba the Hutt and star in a new line of workout tapes finally comes to fruition, but everything goes horribly awry when the man gets ink poisoning, lead poisoning and mercury poisoning all at once."

3. "When a woman dies and is reincarnated as a power saw, she uses a telepathic link with feral cats to help trick and trap and kill her former-lover-turned-murderer-turned-taxidermist."

Here are the rules:

1. Stick to the format, but have fun with the idea. You want your logline to be one sentence only and must be 60 words or fewer, and explain what the movie is about. It's what you put in that one sentence that will win you this competition. So the trick is to make your logline a terribly creative idea that's pitched in a professional manner.
2. The contest will go until the end of August 2008. Submissions received after that will not be considered.
3. I will judge the contest, with some possible input from other WD and WD Books staffers.
4. To participate, simply click on "Comments" at the end of this post and leave your submission as a comment with your full name and e-mail. You must include your full name and e-mail.
5. You can submit up to two (2) bad loglines. You can include both in the same comment post as you wish.
6. The contest is open to everyone of all ages, save those employees, officers and directors of GLA's publisher, F+W Media (formerly F+W Publications).
7. There are a lot more rules (most of them dealing with legal stuff) that you can find in the comments section of this post.
8. By posting a terrible logline for consideration in this contest, you are agreeing to the terms written here as well as the terms added by me at the beginning of the "Comments" section of this blog post.

The Prizes:

First prize (grand prize): 1) A query letter critique from me. 2) A follow-up phone call to discuss the query critique and a plan of action for seeing your work published (basically: you ask questions, I answer). 3) Copies of the 2009 Guide to Literary Agents and the 2009 Writer's Market. 4) Praise on this blog from yours truly.

Two runner-up prizes: 1) A free copy of either the 2009 Guide to Literary Agents or the 2009 Writer's Market. Your choice.

Good luck!!!

Contests

8/18/2008 4:40:10 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [196]

Announcing: The 2009 Screenwriter's & Playwright's Market
Posted by Chuck

Q. I recently purchased the 2009 Guide to Literary Agents, and found that Script Agents are no longer listed (unless I didn't see them). Did I simply miss them, or is Writer's Market Books publishing a separate book for them, or is WM simly deciding not to list script agents anymore? (I'm looking for agents representing screenwriters.)
    - Paul

A. I've been meaning to blog about this, and such a perfectly-phrased question is a good opportunity. (Thank you, Paul.)
       Yes, Paul - you're correct. For many years, GLA listed script agents that handle screenwriters and playwrights. The reason we took script agents out of this most recent addition is that we are ending production on the first-ever Screenwriter's & Playwright's Market, the ninth book in the market book series. Last summer, before I even had an agent, I drafted up a book proposal for this new idea - a market book dedicated to writers of stage and screen. I submitted the proposal to my boss, the imprint head here at Writer's Digest Books. The high-ups here at F+W Media thought it was a good idea, and I made my case to be the book's first editor, as I've had plays produced and know some people in the Hollywood world, etc. They agreed, and that was that.
       The book comes out in January 2009 and is basically a huge resource full of contests, agents, managers, production companies, and conferences. As usual, before the hundreds of pages of listings, we have about 25 instructional articles relating to the craft and business of writing (in this case, screenwriting, TV writing and playwriting). The editing process is finally wrapping up after 14 months and I'm very pleased with the book. I'll talk more about this as the in-store date comes closer.

Playwriting | Screenwriting and Script Agents

8/18/2008 3:20:51 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [1]

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Can Foreigners Get Stamps for SASE's?
Posted by Chuck

Q. Help! Please. I am in need of an agent. I know exactly who I want. He has been recommended to me by one of his former clients, who happens to be a very established writer. However, I am not sure that I will ever be able to query this agent. His submissions guidelines state that queries that do not contain the coveted SASE [self-addressed, stamped envelope] will be recycled upon receipt. I'm not lazy or cheap. I'd gladly include one, but being Canadian that is much more difficult than you would think. USPS is no longer shipping stamps to foreign locations. Can I climb out of the slush with a sticky note saying, "recycle if rejected"? I know this agent likes to represent Canadians, but the truth is, now we'll only be able to e-query or have American friends smuggle us stamps like we once smuggled them Cuban cigars. I've been looking for answers around the blog scene, but as of yet, haven't received any. This dilemma really does extend past me missing out on my dream agent. The doors to many agents and publishing houses have now been closed to foreigners.
- Christy

A. Very interesting about the USPS and the limited availability of stamps. Anyone else have an experience with this? It's news to me. What about International Reply Coupons?
Yeah, and my first suggestion was to simply e-query. It's easier anyway. Do you just like sending in snail mail submissions or does this agent not take e-queries?
If I were you, I would send in the submission like normal. At the bottom of the query, include a note about why you have no SASE and apologize for not following his specific guidelines. Hopefully he will be pleased that you had done some research on him.

Queries and Synopses and Proposals

8/17/2008 10:55:21 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [7]

Sending Requested Work in Late
Posted by Chuck

Q. I attended a writer's conference where I had an opportunity to pitch an agent in hopes of getting feedback on my pitch letter, and also hopefully getting the agent interested in my novel. This agent gave me her business card and said she was interested in seeing my first three chapters - but first she wanted me to cut approximately 33,000 words off my manuscript, because it's extremely difficult for a first time novelist to sell something over 100,000 words.
I have two questions: 1) is it true that first time novelists should try to stay in that 100,000-words-or-less guideline? 2) It's taken me well over a year to trim those 33,000 words out (it hasn't helped that during that time I moved to another state and began a grueling new job search, which took time away from my editing). When I finally do finish those edits, is it too late to send my first three chapters in? Should I send a pitch letter first, reminding her of our meeting and hoping against hope that she'll remember me? Your advice is much appreciated! Keep up the great blogging!
- Erin

A. Yes, it's true that you should aim for approximately 100,000 words. I end up saying this a lot at conferences and many writers kinda shake their heads, thinking this is either untrue or unfair or both.
Second part: Send what was requested - it's not too late. Send your query letter in, and, at the beginning, mention how she requested the work at the conference, and how it has been trimmed in length as per her request. Then include the chapters.
The more agents I talk to, the more just admit that most of what they hear at conferences blends together. So the fact that you're sending it in pretty late is not exactly good, per se, but likely harmless. Good luck.

Queries and Synopses and Proposals

8/17/2008 10:45:18 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [2]

Did Anyone See American Teen (the movie)?
Posted by Chuck

Good movie.

It's a documentary that follows around four highschoolers during their entire senior year. It's essentially a real-life Breakfast Club, with a "princess," an "artsy musician girl," a "jock," and a "band nerd."

I've been thinking about the movie all weekend. Some of it fell flat, but Hannah's storyline in particular (the girl on the left in the poster) was captivating.

8/17/2008 10:28:55 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [2]

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Synopsis in a Query?
Posted by Chuck

Q. I'm not one of those scurrilous people in a movie theater who loudly announces the plot ending to the entire audience. But what's best for a synopsis in a query letter? Should I include my ingenious plot twist at the end? Or should I provide intrigue so a literary agent will want to read the manuscript?
- James

A. Do the latter. Provide intrigue so a literary agent will want to read more. A query is only designed to deliver the hook - the cool idea (or catch) for an idea that makes your story work. It's not meant to reveal the twist ending or the true killer. A synopsis is a long document that's something different altogether.
And regarding your movie theater demeanor ... your loss.

Queries and Synopses and Proposals

8/12/2008 10:10:58 AM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [6]

The International Women's Fiction Festival in Italy
Posted by Chuck

I just got back from a vacation with some college buddies (a "man-cation" - my first) up in Put-in-Bay, which is an island on lake Erie not terribly far from Toledo or Detroit. Crazy place. I'm still trying to break out of vacation mode and start firing on all cylinders.

But speaking of traveling, the more exciting news is that I will be headed to teach at a writers' conference in Italy! How cool!

The conference is the International Women's Fiction Festival, held in Matera, Italy. Matera is in the middle of the country and is a very old and historic location. The conference itself is an amazing event. It gathers professionals and writers from all over the globe. When I speak on panels, I'll likely be up there with other editors from Germany, Italy, France and England, and we may all even have those cool UN headphones for translations. I'm dying to get in a heated discussion with someone and demand Adlai-Stevenson-style that they "Don't wait for the translation - answer me now!"

Other cool stuff about the conference:

The theme this year is "Books Without Borders."
Different sessions in the conference will talk about multicultural writing, as well as how to slowly build a worldwide readership.
"Memoir Writing as Therapy" will be taught. If maybe you just need to get away from it all and relax (perhaps there has just been a death in family, etc.), a session like this can do wonders.
The whole conference program, naturally, is available online. You won't see my name anywhere yet, though, because I was originally lined up as a presenter for next year's conference. They had a cancellation for this year, and I'm filling in.

If, say, you have spare time, a desire to write, and a penchant for adventure, think about going to Italy and being part of such an amazing event. Writers in attendance will be immersed in an array of perspectives about writing and publishing in the world, and you can tack on a vacation at the beginning or the end to enjoy the wonderful country. Perhaps your spouse has always talked about 1) writing a novel/memoir, and 2) going to Italy. Well here is your chance to provide the ultimate anniversary gift!

And to answer your question, yes my last name of Sambuchino is very Italian, and no, I have never visited the homeland. But I will arrive in a blaze of glory, and I'm fully expecting like six full-blooded Sicilian mafioso guys to greet me off the plane, do that kiss-on-both-cheeks thing, and make me a button man in the Sambuchino Family over there I never knew exised. Godfather style.

Writers' Conferences

8/12/2008 9:52:43 AM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [4]

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Agents' Chapter 1 Pet Peeves!
Posted by Chuck

The forthcoming issue of Writer's Digest magazine (Sept/Oct 08) has a piece in it that I wrote on literary agents' chapter 1 pet peeves. For it, I basically just contacted a whole bunch of agents - new and experienced, fiction and nonfiction, Christian and not, juvenile and adult - and asked them all what they hate to see in chapter 1.

They gave a lot of great feedback - real good practical stuff touching on cliches and pet peeves and overused beginnings. The article will be online in several weeks, so you can see a lot of great advice soon.

Although we saved plenty of juicy parts for the WD article, in the meantime, enjoy all this great feedback that didn't make the final cut for space purposes!

Agents Chapter 1 Pet Peeves:

"Anything cliché such as ‘It was a dark and stormy night’ will turn me off. I hate when a narrator or author addresses the reader (e.g., 'Gentle reader')."
        - Jennie Dunham, Dunham Literary

"Sometimes a reasonably good writer will create an interesting character and describe him in a compelling way, but then he’ll turn out to be some unimportant bit player. Other annoying, unoriginal things I see too often: some young person going home to a small town for a funeral, someone getting a phone call about a death, a description of a psycho lurking in the shadows, or a terrorist planting a bomb."
        - Ellen Pepus, Ellen Pepus Literary Agency

"I’m really turned off by a protagonist named Isabelle who goes by 'Izzy.' No. Really. I am."
        - Stephany Evans, FinePrint Literary Management

"I dislike opening scenes that you think are real (I rep adult genre fiction), then the protagonist wakes up. It makes me feel cheated. And so many writers use this hackneyed device. I dislike lengthy paragraphs of world building and scene setting up front. I usually crave action close to the beginning of the book (and so do readers)."
        - Laurie McLean, Larsen/Pomada Literary Agents

"I do in fact hate it when someone wakes up from a dream in Chapter 1, and I dislike an overly long prologue. The worst thing that you can do is let that crucial chapter be boring - that’s the chapter that has to grab my interest!"
        - Michelle Brower, Wendy Sherman Associates

"I don't like an opening line that's 'My name is...,' introducing the narrator to the reader so blatantly. I might be prompted to groan before reading on a bit further to see if the narration gets any less stale. There are far better ways in Chapter 1 to establish an instant connection between narrator and reader. I’m also usually not a fan of prologues, preferring to find myself in the midst of a moving plot on page 1 rather than being kept outside of it, or eased into it."
        - Michelle Andelman, Andrea Brown Literary Agency

"I hate seeing a 'run-down list:' Names, hair color, eye color, height, even weight sometimes. Other things that bother me is over-describing the scenery or area where the story starts. Usually a manuscript can lose the first 3-5 chapters and start there. Besides the run-down list preaching to me about a subject, I don't like having a character immediately tell me how much he/she hates the world for whatever reason. In other words, tell me your issues on politics, the environment, etc. through your character. That is a real turn off to me."
        - Miriam Hees (editor), Blooming Tree Press

"Perhaps my biggest pet peeve with an opening chapter is when an author features too much exposition - when they go beyond what is necessary for simply 'setting the scene.' I want to feel as if I'm in the hands of a master storyteller, and starting a story with long, flowery, overly-descriptive sentences (kind of like this one) makes the writer seem amateurish and the story contrived. Of course, an equally jarring beginning can be nearly as off-putting, and I hesitate to read on if I'm feeling disoriented by the fifth page. I enjoy when writers can find a good balance between exposition and mystery. Too much accounting always ruins the mystery of a novel, and the unknown is what propels us to read further. It is what keeps me up at night saying 'just one more chapter, then I'll go to sleep.' If everything is explained away in the first chapter; I'm probably putting the book down and going to sleep."
       - Peter Miller, Peter Miller Literary

"1. Squinting into the sunlight with a hangover in a crime novel. Good grief -- been done a million times. 2. A sci-fi novel that spends the first two pages describing the strange landscape. 3. A trite statement ("Get with the program" or "Houston, we have a problem" or "You go girl" or "Earth to Michael" or "Are we all on the same page?"), said by a weenie sales guy, usually in the opening paragraph. 4. A rape scene in a Christian novel, especially in the first chapter. 5. 'Years later, Monica would look back and laugh...' 6. "The [adjective] [adjective] sun rose in the [adjective] [adjective] sky, shedding its [adjective] light across the [adjective] [adjective] [adjective] land."
       - Chip MacGregor, MacGregor Literary

"Here are things I can't stand: Cliché openings in Fantasy can include an opening scene set in a battle (and my peeve is that I don't know any of the characters yet so why should I care about this battle) or with a pastoral scene where the protagonist is gathering herbs (I didn't realize how common this is). Opening chapters where a main protagonist is in the middle of a bodily function (jerking off, vomiting, peeing, or what have you) is usually a firm NO right from the get-go. Gross. Long prologues that often don't have anything to do with the story. So common in Fantasy again. Opening scenes that our all dialogue without any context. I could probably go on..."
       - Kristin Nelson, Nelson Literary

"I recently read a ms when the second line was something like, 'Let me tell you this, Dear Reader...' What do you think of that?"
        - Sheree Bykofsky, Sheree Bykofsky Literary

"I know this may sound obvious, but too much 'telling' vs. 'showing' in the first chapter is a definite warning sign for me – the first chapter should present a compelling scene, not a road map for the rest of the book. The goal is to make the reader curious about your characters, fill their heads with questions that must be answered, not fill them in on exactly where, when, who and how. Don’t ever describe eye color either..."
        - Emily Sylvan Kim, Prospect Agency

"Characters that are moving around doing little things, but essentially nothing. Washing dishes & thinking, staring out the window & thinking, tying shoes, thinking ... Authors often do this to transmit information, but the result is action in a literal sense but no real energy in a narrative sense. The best rule of thumb is always to start the story where the story starts."
        - Dan Lazar, Writers House

"I hate reading purple prose, taking the time to set up-- to describe something so beautifully and that has nothing to do with the actual story. I also hate when an author starts something and then says '(the main character) would find out later.' I hate gratuitous sex and violence anywhere in the manuscript. If it is not crucial to the story then I don't want to see it in there, in any chapters."
        - Cherry Weiner, Cherry Weiner Literary

Agent Advice (Agent Interviews)

8/5/2008 2:38:06 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [18]

Kind Words From Author Brad Thor
Posted by Chuck

Author Brad Thor (His book, The Last Patriot, was a NYT #1 bestseller) had these kind words to say when meeting WD editor Maria Schneider:

"Writer’s Digest is always going to have a very special place in my heart because Writer’s Digest was there at the beginning. I read the magazine and I used the Guide to Literary Agents. As a starting writer, you folks were an incredible resource for me. I mean that. I recommend Writer’s Digest to all beginning writers; when they have a manuscript and are trying to move ahead to the next level."

Yep ... He gave GLA some mad props. Awesomeness.

8/5/2008 1:16:59 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [0]

All About Children's Agents
Posted by Chuck

Alice Pope, editor of Children's Writer's & Illustrators Market, has been in the thick of things out in Beverly Hills this past week at the SCBWI Summer Conference, where the best and the brightest involved in the juvenile writing world gather to network and learn from one another. In fact, she has been blogging about her adventures nonstop. Check out her blog homepage here.

Of particular interest is this post called All About Agents, where she listens to a panel of agents talk.

Also check out a post about Michael Bourret of Dystel & Goderich Literary. The post is great because Michael really has some time to talk about what he wants, what he's not getting in the slush pile, and what's selling.

Children's Writing

8/5/2008 10:01:20 AM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [0]

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

New Agent Alert: Josh Getzler of Writers House
Posted by Chuck

Reminder: Newer agents/agencies are golden opportunities for new writers because they're likely building their client list; however, always make sure your work is as perfect as it can be before submitting, and only query agencies that are a great fit for your work. Otherwise, you're just wasting time and postage.

Josh Getzler of Writers House

21 W. 26th Street, New York NY 10010. Email: jgetzler@writershouse.com. www.writershouse.com Seeking new and unagented writers. Prior to becoming a junior agent, Mr. Getzler have had 15 years in the business (not all publishing). Currently handles: 75% fiction, 25% nonfiction. Nonfiction areas of fiction: Biography, Business/Investing/Finance, Music, Religious, Cookbooks, History, Sports. Fiction areas of fiction: General fiction, Mystery, Historical novels (esp. mysteries), Thrillers, Noir, Children's. Does not want to receive: picture books.

How to contact: E-mail only with query with five or so pages. Synopsis not necessary. Actively seeking: Foreign and historical thrillers. Recent sales: Devil's Thrill by Gerald Elias (Minotaur, Fall 2009).

This new agent tip
provided by GLA blogger
extraordinaire Kristen Howe.

New Agency Alerts

7/30/2008 1:53:28 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [1]

Agency Profile: Ashley Grayson Literary Agency
Posted by Chuck

Ashley Grayson Literary Agency

1342 18th St., San Pedro CA 90732. Fax: (310)514-1148. E-mail: graysonagent@earthlink.net. Member Agents: Ashley Grayson (fantasy, mystery, thrillers, young adult); Carolyn Grayson (chick lit, mystery, children's, nonfiction, women's fiction, romance, thrillers); Denise Dumars (mind/body/spirit, women's fiction, dark fantasy/horror); Lois Winston (women's fiction, chick lit, mystery). Prefers established writers, mostly referrals. Established: 1976. Member of AAR. Represents 100 clients. 5% of clients are new/unpublished writers.

Specializes in: "We prefer to work with published (traditional print), established authors. We will give first consideration to authors who come recommended to us by our clients or other publishing professionals. We accept a very small number of new, previously unpublished authors." Currently Handles: 20% Nonfiction Books; 50% Novels; 30% Juvenile Books. Nonfiction areas of interest: Business/Economics; Computers/Electronic; History; Popular Culture; Science/Technology; Self-Help/Personal Improvement; Sports; True Crime/Investigative; mind/body/spirit; health; lifestyle. Fiction areas of interest: Fantasy, Juvenile, Multicultural, Mystery/Suspense, Romance, Science Fiction, Young Adult, Women's, chick lit.

How to Contact: As of 2008, the agency was only open to fiction authors with publishing credits (no self-published). For nonfiction, only writers with great platforms will be considered. Accepts e-mail queries. Recent Sales: Ball Don't Lie, by Matt de la Pena (Delacorte); Heaven, by Jack Cohen and Ian Stewart (Warner Books); I Wish I Never Met You, by Denise Wheatley (Touchstone/Simon & Schuster). Other Clients Represented: Isaac Adamson, John Barnes, Andrew Fox, Barb and J.C. Hendee, Geoffrey Landis, Bruce Coville, J.B. Cheaney, David Lubar and Christopher Pike. Terms: Agent receives 15% commission on domestic sales; 20% commission on foreign sales.

Agency Profile

7/30/2008 1:42:37 PM (Eastern Daylight Time, UTC-04:00)

Comments [0]

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